Happy place
Do you have a happy place?
A place where you do your best work? Where you do your best thinking? Where you are the most productive? Where your creative juices flow? A place that has become critical to your routine and that makes your work more joyful?
For years, my happy place was planes, hotel rooms, and lobbies. I did my best work while I traveled. I even wrote my book while traveling. The short length of time I had in these places helped me create a sense of urgency around my work, and there was something about traveling and seeing new places and new people that expanded my mind and fueled my creativity. I loved it, and my brain got used to it. And then, in March, everything changed.
Now, instead of doing my work from hotel lobbies with peaceful piano music playing in the background, I often find myself sharing space with an eight-year-old. Just last week, I was leading a coaching session for CEOs and C-Suite execs. I was at our home in Michigan, where we spend time every other week visiting my bonus daughter, Evie. That morning, we’d had a quick family meeting, debriefing who was doing what and where: Evie would be doing virtual school in the upstairs office, Spiros would be catching up on work in the dining room, and I would be leading this coaching session in the living room for the next 2.5 hours. I thought we were all on the same page. But about an hour into the session, Evie comes downstairs and decides to listen to her class in the kitchen, no more than ten feet from where I am. And as she does that, all of a sudden, I hear a leaf blower outside: Spiros has decided it’s a great time to clean off the back patio. I had to pause my session to remind my family of our agreement, and luckily, the people in my coaching group were very understanding, and we had a good laugh. Oh, 2020. (I’ve decided my new meeting spot is in the basement… It’s totally safe there.)
If you can relate to this, I so feel you. And this is only my life part-time because we have Evie part-time—I can’t imagine if this was every day. When we are at our home in Houston, Spiros works at the hospital during the day, and I have the house to myself.
But still, even when I’m home by myself, it’s hard. I’m not used to doing all of my work from a home office every day. At times, work and home blend, and it hurts my productivity. I find myself pausing work to fold laundry—that certainly wasn’t an option when I was traveling. And while I know this is temporary, there are days when I really, really miss my happy place. I miss creative breakthroughs on airplanes. So I just want to acknowledge that if you, too, miss your pre-COVID happy place, you aren’t alone.
But most importantly—and the reason I wrote this post in the first place—I want to remind you that you have the power to create a new happy place. Even though your circumstances might be different, you can still carve out a special place for yourself.
For me, finding a new happy place started with learning to focus on what I can control. I started with my space: I chose a room in my Houston home that’s just for work. I decorated it with pieces I love so that every time I walk in, I smile. And while at first this room didn’t do what traveling did for me, I’m starting to find myself being more and more creative in it. It’s like my brain is learning that this is our new spot. In Michigan, I’m going to do the same. That new space for me is going to be the basement. (I wasn’t kidding.)
Next, I focused on time. When I thought about why traveling was my happy place, I realized it had less to do with my physical surroundings and more to do with those “magic hours” I’d have on flights or in the hotel lobby before leaving for the airport. I had very few (if any) interruptions during those times, and they always had a clear endpoint or deadline. I began to think how I might be able to create a similar feeling at home. For me, I’m a morning person. Right after I wake up is when I feel most creative and when my brain is at its best and clearest, so I started getting up earlier and earlier to have more of that morning magic time. Now—no matter if I am in Houston or Michigan—I get up at 4 a.m. I light a candle, I drink some coffee, I read a chapter of a book, and then I dive in to work. It feels new and different and sacred. 4 a.m. to 9 a.m. is my new happy place. And as it turns out, I now feel that I am producing work that’s comparable to or better than what I did when I was traveling.
2020 is hard. I keep saying it, and I will say it again. 2021 will be hard too. There is a lot that is out of our control, and losing your happy place might be one of those things. But there is also a lot that is in our control. We get the chance to create a new place. Whether it’s a time, a room, a ritual or something else—something new, something different, something that becomes sacred. Something that makes the leading-a-coaching-session-while-kid-is-blasting-Zoom-and-fiancé-is-blasting-leaves okay, because you know that you still have your 4 a.m. happy place, and there isn’t anything that anyone can do to take that away from you.
What will yours be?
Hugs through the screen,
Kristen
PS: Have you heard of our LIVE show every Wednesday at 11 a.m. ET? Think of it as real talk. Our leadership team and I share the challenges we’re navigating as leaders and take questions from you! You can register here: https://bit.ly/3kWe2kT. It’s the same link each week. Hope to see you there!
